I Hate You

They said you were strong,
tough enough to go,
to leave without tears.
to leave without fears
of death.
To cause others
to grieve your memory.

but strength
would have been to remain,
to live, and grow gain on gain
but you left to fight in other lands.
I don’t forgive,
you ran away,
a coward, you hid.

You deserted,
you’re unforgiven
from my heart
and my mind,
you ran away.
To be brave
would have been to stay.
To live to continue
day on day

to face first the hour,
then the week and the year,
your war here.
To carry on
with all you started,
to take what your father left,
broken hearted.
To make it better,
to build it as he had done,
through sweat and pain,
and gain
life with tears
blood and labour,
love and dedication,
to make of it a vocation
a life lived.

To continue and leave behind
a bequest of words and work
the gift of a strong mind and all it held
but you were weak, you ran.

I stayed,
fought the war
on home ground
I took all we had
and made of it an altar
to the past.
I didn’t have you
so it could not last,
or be the same

I had no ownership
of my soul,
I could dedicate
it to nothing
but labour only
in surety day to day.
You lay in foreign lands
Dead and gone
another’s gun in your hand

They said you were strong
to leave but I hated you.
I don’t think you were strong
I saw only wrong.

Hurt and death, a hole were you now lay.
Strength would have been to stay.

 

©Dave Kavanagh February 2016
 

 

 

 

 

 

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